Review: Appleseed Orchard Epcot Food and Wine Festival

We continue from Canada.

A couple of years ago, Appleseed Orchard took up residence inside Canada’s Circle-Vision 360 theater, since O’ Canada was in the process of being switched over to Canada Far & Wide. EPCOT has since made the switch to the new production that’s more like 287.2 degrees. Apparently, Disney would prefer to sell apples in the building than offer the film presentation, which is barely 18 months old. Apparently biomes and off-camera narrators didn’t exactly resonate with guests. I’m at least one of those myself, but I would implore you to stick with me rather than spending 365 days a year picking apples.

If you’re looking for the Orchard, continue down past the entrance to Le Bifteck Cher Cellier on the left until you eventually arrive around the corner into the world of la pomme.

Food:

• Apple Crumble Tart – $4.50
• Apple Chips – $4

Beverages:

• Frozen Apple Pie – $4.50
• Cinnamon Apple Cider – $3.75
• Collective Arts Brewing Circling the Sun Hard Cider – $5 or $9
• Original Sin Hard Cider – $5 or $9
• Blake’s Hard Cider Co. Saint Chéri Bourbon Barrel Aged Cherry – $5 or $9
• Big Storm Brewing Co. Apple Blonde Ale – $5 or $9
• 3 Daughters Brewing Apple Pecan Brown Ale – $5 or $9
• Ivanhoe Park Brewing Company Apple-y Ever After Green Apple Sour Ale – $5 or $9
• Apple Blossom Sky: Fanta Apple, Ginger Beer, Floodwall Apple Brandy, Maple Syrup and Mini Marshmallows – $11.50
• Beer Flight – $9.75
• Cider Flight – $9.75

Most of the items are new with the exceptions of the Frozen Apple Pie and Apple Blossom Sky. And possibly something else apple-related.

Apple Crumble Tart – $4.50

It’s artsy because it’s tilted.

I admittedly did a lousy job of capturing this one as it’s quite a bit of crispy cinnamon crumble covering a plethora of hot, golden, crispy apples inside of a pastry crust. Some cream on top probably would have gone a long way, and I’d rate this one below the Cheesecake from Refreshment Port, but you could certainly do worse if you’re looking to add a dessert with your drinks here. I’d rank it above most quick service desserts and below most Festival finishers.

Taste: 5/10

Value: 5/10

Apple Chips – $4

These were a staple of my childhood as barrels of them surrounded the actual fruit and vegetables in the produce section of the supermarket. You only have to take one look at me to figure out that I’ve never consumed a fruit or vegetable that wasn’t either in a mixed drink, beer, or fashioned into something resembling junk food.

And they are basically that:

I suppose it’s the oil that makes just about everything crispy come in around 140 calories an ounce, but you’d have a tough time looking over the label and convincing yourself that a piece of fruit isn’t the healthy way to go. But health is obviously not a concern here in the midst of a thousand dollars worth of booze and desserts. I actually haven’t felt my heart beat in four years, which I think must have something to do with these Festivals, but the doctor assures me that active blood flow probably wouldn’t do my personality any good anyway.

While I still hesitate to quote grocery store prices, Amazon will sell you 12 bags for $32, or less than $3 each, which is probably about the grocery store price. For me, Food and Wine isn’t about stalking grocery store staples, but the apple chips carry a satisfying crunch and retain a lot of their apple flavor as there aren’t too many other ingredients. It would be nice if the calorie count was about half, as they’re only 20 fewer than an ounce of Lay’s Potato Chips. I’d hold off on these unless you’re really curious and have no other access to them in your igloo in Antarctica, but they’re an easy pass otherwise. And I’ll send you a bag to Antarctica.

Taste: 4/10

Value: 3/10

Cinnamon Apple Cider – $3.75

I don’t know if Big Cinnamon came in and gave the presentation of a lifetime, Disney found a ton of it behind the SpectroMagic carnage (sorry), or if there was some sale I missed when I was in the market for six tons of cinnamon (long story), but it’s certainly a potent ingredient here in the kind world of apples. Indonesia is actually the world’s largest producer of cinnamon, distributing about 40% of the world’s supply, with China following at 30%. With so much of the cinnamon spice overbearing the Tart, and the drink, and the other drink, and the beer, and the cider, this tasted largely like a refreshing glass of apple juice rather than a fancy homemade cider with a much lighter cinnamon content. I would guess it’s poured out of food services storage bags, making it a pretty easy skip for adults. The kids may enjoy it if they’re squeamish and you plan on spending some time here amidst the Indonesian spice. Because nothing calms kids down like more sugar.

Frozen Apple Pie – $4

The Frozen Apple Pie in the middle should keep the kids busy a little longer. It offers a sweet take on the usual slush with a generous helping of of crumbly graham cracker strudel on top. It could certainly use a straw, though. It’s more superfluous now that the Tart is available with the same topping.

Beer Flight – $9.75 or $5 or $9 Individually

With Big Storm Brewing Co. Apple Blonde Ale, 3 Daughters Brewing Apple Pecan Brown Ale, and Ivanhoe Park Brewing Company Apple-y Ever After Green Apple Sour Ale

If you ever hear me say out loud that I’m drinking an Apple-y Ever After, you have my permission to take one of my Chillsners and murder me with it. Heck, take both and make it quick. Or perhaps I deserve to suffer. These beers are out of my wheelhouse, each a little more nutty or fruity than I’d like in my liquid. I like to eat my food and drink my beer. I don’t know if that’s strange. But each is going to be hard or impossible to find on draft elsewhere, so you may want to give the flight a shot and double up on something if it fits your fancy. And please put me out of my misery as I sip this Apple-y Ever After.

Cider Flight – $9.75

With Collective Arts Brewing Circling the Sun Hard Cider, Original Sin Hard Cider McIntosh, and Blake’s Hard Cider Saint Chéri Bourbon Barrel Aged Cherry

I’m not a big cider person, so I appreciated the opportunity to try each as part of the flight. None of them are particularly obtrusive, largely light and mellow with enough sugar to mask the alcohol. I’d go with the Cherry if for no other reason than it sounds fancy, but you may want to start with the Flight and double up on a favorite too.

Apple Blossom Sky – $11.50

Fanta Apple, Ginger Beer, Floodwall Apple Brandy, Maple Syrup, and Mini Marshmallows

This is a strange one with soda, ginger beer, brandy, maple syrup, and marshmallows in a plastic disposable mule cup. The flavors are all over the place. It’s carbonated, sweet, gingery, apple-y, and maple-y, with a thick, viscous mouthfeel and so much ice and marshmallows that you’re liable to pour half the thing down your shirt if you’re not careful. Not that I know anything about that. This is typically bad news when you only own the one. It was certainly interesting to try, but I wouldn’t order another. Someone in your group will likely be happy to finish it. But there might only be one. I would have preferred a drink that showcased the brandy and maple syrup more, instead of just diluting the flavors with a bunch of other stuff.

Appleseed Orchard made a lot of sense when Canada Far & Wide either wasn’t ready or was simply held back, but it feels like a shame to lose an attraction for a booth, particularly given most countries would condemn EPCOT in its current state. Thank goodness for Florida. I’m not sure why they didn’t being back the Charcuterie Board or another savory item, but without any wine, maybe they felt going Full Cinnamon was the way to go.

This is the outdoor section across from Hot Noodle Collection along the walkway up to World Showcase, where they certainly could have set up La Pomme World, but you’ll appreciate the air-conditioning inside, even if Catherine O’Hara isn’t there to quote the humidity of southern Saskatchewan in May from a recording studio probably not in Canada.

Overall, there are some interesting items here, particularly on the drink front, and it’s a cool air-conditioned space, even if you just stand there and nurse a drink from another booth for a while.  We’ve all been there. Beer and cider aficionados will want to take a peek at those lists, but there’s nothing here that I would outright recommend other than maybe that Streusel-topped drink.

And Canada Cart is right above serving La Fin du Monde and Crown Royal. What else do you need to know?

We’ll take a brief look at Ireland, which doesn’t open until October 1st, before moving on to France. If there was a word in that post that looked like I had an aneurysm when I typed it, it’s certainly possible. Or it could be French. Or both.

Ireland is up next (come October 1st) with France now open.