We continue from Deconstructed Dish.
At this point, I think we have to assume that the Orange Bird knows where somebody’s body is buried as the kiosk returns under the same name for what “feels” like the 37th Festival in a row. It isn’t unusual for Disney to reuse the same physical kiosks from Festival to Festival. For example, the kiosk in Canada is called “Masterpiece Kitchen” for the Festival of the Arts, “Northern Bloom” for Flower and Garden, the very clever “Canada” for Food and Wine and then “Yukon” for Festival of the Arts. It’s possible that Disney doesn’t want anyone questioning where they can pick up their Orange Bird Sipper, though you would think the whole menu, people clutching them in the general vicinity, and the fact that they’re lined up all along the booth would be reasonable indications that you’ve entered Orange Bird Country.
As with the Festival of the Holidays, we still have no food options to speak of, which is a bit odd considering it was one of the more accessible booths back in its lobster tail and crispy chicken days, leaving us with the Orange Cream Shake, a variety of Florida Orange Groves Winery Selections, and a different beer.
Orange Cream Shake served in a Souvenir Orange Bird Sipper Cup — $15
Standing about eight inches tall, the Bird is full of an Orange-Julius-like, thin orange substance; the consistency is similar to a melted Creamsicle bar. The very sweet orange and vanilla flavors are probably too sugary to be refreshing, but most people are probably after the souvenir vessel, anyway. Note that this version is non-alcoholic. For $15, the construction of the bright orange plastic bird “feels” pretty good in the hand and will probably look great on your shelf and/or eBay page. I’d recommend picking one up if you like this sort of collectible.
Taste: 5/10
Value: ?/10
Florida Orange Groves Winery Selections
You could potentially give one of the wines a try. The $12 Sparkling Key Lime Wine tastes like artificial, fizzy key lime pie.
For a time, Florida Orange Groves served the wine in pouches, which may or may not bode well for its quality. It’s probably an adult Capri Sun pool situation for most. Granted, they are going for the whole Florida thing here at Citrus Blossom, but I think they’d do better with the typical shimmering sips situation of mimosas and standard sparkling wines and champagnes. Demand for the Orange Bird is a tenth of what it was when it debuted a couple of years ago, if that. The lack of food options may be intended to move through the people who do want the sipper faster, but there aren’t a whole lot of them these days. If Florida Orange Groves is putting up some money to sponsor the booth or basically giving Disney the wine for free, I’d probably drop the prices in half to get the spirit in the hands of more people. You virtually never see anybody walking around with anything from Citrus Blossom these days, so I’m not sure why they haven’t switched things up.
I wouldn’t ordinarily leave you out in whatever Florida defines as “the cold,” but these sorts of wines really aren’t my thing, and I didn’t want to spend $50 guzzling them all in short order only to report that they’re not really to my tastes. The wines are typically bitterer than you might expect, taste largely artificial, and usually come in at a below-average ABV. Take that for whatever it’s worth. Bottles are also available, probably at a more reasonable price point should you elect to take one back to the room.
Lost Coast Brewery Tangerine Wheat Ale – $4.50 or $8.50
Strangely enough, Morocco served the Tangerine Wheat Ale for a short time back in 2013 when they were trying to service ice cream directly in the sun at a juice bar that didn’t carry any juice.
The hazy orange Tangerine Wheat is citrus-forward and potentially a little too sweet for a cooler day in January or February, even if this is still Florida and it could very well be 85 degrees or 45 degrees at any given time. The carbonation and overall flavor profile may remind you more of an orange soda than anything. This probably isn’t one for the snobs, but it’s a good choice if you’re looking for a stronger, less juicy Schöfferhofer with twice the ABV.
Overall, you’ve got another shot at the Orange Bird if you’ve missed the last 36 opportunities. Spending money on any of the wines or the beer won’t ruin your life, and you may prefer the bitter, fruity flavor profiles more than the guy drinking cabernet out of a box as he writes these reviews.
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