Sorry this is such a peasant website. I don’t mean you’re a peasant. Well. Chances are you are a peasant. According to Google Analytics, this website reaches one computer in England. It may very well be the Queen. I doubt it. But you never know. While the blogosphere was getting wined and dined at the Vision House last night by Disney, your consummate professional Disney blogger was sitting at home crying while typing up a construction update about Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. Such is life. We can’t all be VIPs. So today we are going to dredge out to Vision House with the other lowlifes. No vassals need apply.
Vision House officially opened today, April 22nd, in Innoventions East. It joins two of Innoventions better exhibits, Sum of All Thrills and Stormstruck. It replaces the House of Innoventions, which we took a look at here near the end of the post. House of Innoventions was basically a walking commercial for mind blowing products like Microsoft Kinect, toasters, a table made entirely out of cardboard, and a drum set.
Habit Heroes is still behind curtains. I’m not expecting it to reopen.
A Chevy Volt sits outside the house. Luckily, it isn’t on fire (yet). Hopefully they removed the engine.
One thing you’ll notice immediately is that they did a great job with the exterior. House of Innoventions basically looked like a house designed to look like a dungeon. Vision House is much more inviting with glass doors that allow you to see inside. The brick work looks great. I think this is going to attract a lot more people. A really nice job.
Ignore the sort of weird tree line.
And focus on this artificial tree instead.
Oh my science! A new scotch drinking location? And I was so close to publishing the book! This looks to have everything I look for in a scotch drinking location. Dark, a good view, and creepy.
This sliding door functions as the exit. We’ll see the entrance shortly though!
More shrubbery and an awfully large air conditioner.
For the grand opening, Green Builder Media was hosting several presentations throughout the day. We’ll take a look at “Will It Break?” shortly. SPOILER! It has nothing to do with Pirates of the Caribbean.
Setting up the presentation.
Reminds me of those educational “comic books” they used to hand out in elementary school. Rolled up, they make outstanding weapons!
The glass doors really are a nice touch.
Okay….so the paper goes in the one that says paper.
And the aluminum goes in the one that says aluminum.
Then the turkey leg must go on top of the trash can lid! And to think I didn’t score “genius” on the online IQ test I just took!
The entrance. They take about 20 people at a time and the short queue runs off to the side of the House. Normally, the wait is only as long as it takes for the first room to open up and there’s a short introduction before that here. The house is sectioned off so that three groups can be inside at once without running into each other.
The monitors are coming soon.
While we’re here, we’ll take a look at this presentation. Apparently it’s dangerous because we’re not allowed any closer than this!
It was basically a commercial for Schott, which appears to be the Siemens of glass production. Which is to say no one has heard of them and they’re from Germany.
The presentation had something to do with frogs.
First there were a lot of frogs. Then some of the frogs were caught in nets!
And then there were no frogs! What does this have to do with anything, you ask? Nothing as far as I can tell.
So now we’re going to dunk some glass into cold liquid.
But first, I see a wireless connection detected!
Long story short. He dunked the glass in liquid nitrogen and it didn’t break.
Okay, enough preshow. Here we are listening to the introduction to the Vision House. Or the preshow, so to speak. Like the House of Innoventions, the volume isn’t nearly loud enough. I couldn’t hear much back here with Sum of All Thrills right next door.
The first area is the living room and kitchen. The glasses are made out of milk jugs or some such.
Throughout, you’ll notice they have a lot of stuff. A lot of stuff.
The living room.
Each room can be kept a different temperature.
In this one, we’re saving the world by cooling the house down to 73 degrees in Florida. Go figure. Mine is set to 81 degrees during the day and 78 degrees at night.
A look back.
So the one thing I find obnoxious about Vision House (and its predecessor, House of Innoventions) is that the narrator will not stop talking about the family that lives here. Disney, we realize no one actually lives here. House of Innoventions isn’t like Maelstrom, where we’re willingly transported back to the time of trolls, vikings, gas rigs, parades, and more trolls. This is a fake house in a theme park. No one is moving in upstairs. No one is planting flowers outside. No one is doing 400 loads of laundry a year in the washing machine. But we get to hear about it anyway.
The kitchen, where everything is efficient.
It’s going to be tricky to get to our potential scotch drinking location.
The living room:
This post interrupted by Bosch to tell you to go out and buy Bosch! Bosch! Bosch! Bosch! Amusingly, Bosch is also a German brand. Whoever Disney has working the Germans deserves a raise and a Glückliches neues Jahr!
Told you they have a lot of stuff. Sort of like saving the world via buying a new Prius every five years. You go girl. I took a nap on the short bed during this section. I caught something about hypoallergenic sheets or something.
The laundry room.
It’s a Bosch. Apparently it doesn’t use a lot of water. And has a bunch of buttons. And is very expensive. And is a Bosch!
The other half of the bathroom.
Pretty sure this is the same toilet from the House of Innoventions. Still next level though!
Seems like it would behoove the earth friendly to simply close their own shades instead of using the power necessary to keep the whole system running. But half the fun of being earth conscious is the pretentiousness that accompanies it, right?
Outside we have a greenhouse, growing the wrong things.
There’s something special about the roof.
So these are plants planted into the wall. This isn’t some clever camera trick. Trust me, I don’t know any! Apparently the plants improve air quality. I’ve personally never seen anyone plant plants into a wall, but it’s pretty neat! I mgiht just staple some ferns into my wall.
“Nadine’s” desk. She will never sit here.
Various stone samples. I’m not kidding. Cultured stone. All natural clay brick. Boral. Portfolio of possibilities. Your choice.
But mostly Bosch.
Vision House isn’t just a colossal waste of time. Just remember that it’s going to take about 30 minutes. Unless you have a keen interest in spending gobs of money on the “green lifestyle,” you’ll probably want to spend your time elsewhere unless you have three or more days in Epcot. Most people will find even the most minor attractions more enjoyable. It’s very similar to what you’d find at a “home show” or similar event at a convention center or dome. That said, it does look nice on the outside.
Back to the November analysis tomorrow. Should have at least the first two weeks ready and hopefully up until Thanksgiving week. More Epcot on tap along with a walk over to the BoardWalk Inn. We’ve got Spicy Chicken and Cheese poppers. A lot of pictures of pillows. Some flower pictures.
And I found the “Bold HDR” button on the camera. So this website is about to get even more obnoxious. Bigger: http://i.imgur.com/guXFj.jpg
It can always be worse.